Can my kids share a room?
In the current housing climate, square footage can be difficult to come by. As lovely as it is in theory for siblings to have their own rooms, it’s not always practical for us as parents. We live in fear of getting even less sleep than we currently do, because one sibling might wake the other and we might end up lying in bed at night with our partner playing “name that cry.”
When our kiddos are little, we can get by by having the youngest share our room or by adding some nice touches to the walk-in closet or laundry room and calling it the nursery. Eventually, though, if our littles continue to grow and our square footage stays the same, we need to take the plunge and move them into a room together. And that is totally okay!
If you are feeling anxiety about the idea of moving your two littles into a shared space, check out our Youtube video about baby and toddler sharing a room.
In the meantime, let’s starting removing the fear and talk about how to help young siblings room-share successfully:
Setting up the room.
When setting up the bedroom, have the siblings far apart enough that they cannot touch, and use a partition if possible. This will help to limit visual and physical distractions.
Use a sound machine to help decrease noises outside and inside the room, placing it near the bedroom door.
Move the furniture 2-3 days beforehand and play with your children in the room, allowing them to associate the new space with happy memories.
Have siblings who are old enough to understand the transition have pieces of ownership over the room, like choosing the colour of their sheets or framing a picture that they coloured.
Making it work:
Start by playing the room together a couple of times a day so that siblings can start forming happy associations with their new room.
Set clear expectations and boundaries around room-sharing, and use helpful tools to support them.
An okay-to-wake clock is an ideal resource that will help baby and toddler understand when to sleep, play, and rise for the day. It also has other useful functions like white noise.
Equip your toddler with “If I wake, then I …” language and steps to take.
Stay in the room for 30 mins for the first few nights following the bedtime routine to keep things calm and to give reminders as necessary.
Troubleshooting Tips to Try:
Use a visual schedule of the bedtime routine to review with your toddler.
Put the heaviest sleeper down first, instead of doing the routine together.
When all else fails, pull back. Keep the oldest sibling in the bedroom, and put the youngest in a pack and play in the walk-in closet or bedroom for a couple of nights to reset. Then start again, keeping boundaries firm and expectations clear.
Are you room sharing with your infant? Need help making the shared sleep space more effective. Watch our tips below.
Sleep sweetly,
Anna